Tag Archives: faith

Flashlight in the Darkness

Dear My Toy Garden Friends,

Friday was the day the tears began and fell through the weekend. May 9th was a date I’d had in mind for weeks and weeks. On May 9th I’d know I’d told myself. On May 9th, I’d know what the next steps for My Toy Garden would be.

For months I’ve felt like I’m surrounded by pitch black darkness. The kind of darkness you can taste…that presses against your eyes in an invisible blindfold. In my hands is a small flashlight that shows me a tiny bit. Enough light to show me just one more step to take. I’ve been blindly following this path wondering where it will lead and trying hard not to worry. Trying hard to trust that His plan is always the best one. The post it on my desk says, “Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, And a light onto my path.” I’ve uttered it many times a day for the last few months.

My steps are quickening right now as I even more tightly focus on today and today alone. Friday, May 9th, came and went leaving me with the feeling that perhaps His plan is for the store to close. My Toy Garden was created in a whirl of magic that sparkled on it’s walls for the last 3 years. Maybe, just maybe, the purpose for which it was created has been fulfilled. Tears flowed for four days as I struggled with wanting my plans to be THE plans in my constant battle for control. Perhaps you have those battles too?

Then at 4 pm yesterday a man came into the store. A man who had been here a month ago in the early stages of the clearance sale. A man who told me he had been planning to open a toy store in Fishers. “You know,” he said. “I’ve been thinking. Rather than create a store from scratch, it might make lots more sense for me to look at buying this one.” Um…yup! I totally agree!

So the conversations begin and my flashlight continues it’s search one step at a time. In a blink that light can land on a pair of shoes that might, just might, allow the store to continue to on. There is still time for other pairs of shoes to step onto the path but not much. I plan to begin to sell the fixtures very soon. (If you have had your eye on any bookcases, tables or other pieces, they might be yours next week.) Now is the time to think who do you know that has had a dream to own a toy store? Invite them to contact me and we can chat. Today, today…where will my path lead to today… Thank you so much for being part of this journey! I will so miss the many conversations I’ve had with you!

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Almost 3 weeks ago now I stood atop a cliff with my toes hanging over the edge. Behind me a journey of steps sure and straight at times and wandering and faint at other times. But each with a forward purpose guided by a higher power. As I lifted my head, I saw an endless horizon. Far below, a bottom I couldn’t see or know what was waiting there. A breeze that was faint months before was now whistling past me lifting my hair in ever changing arcs around my head. My heart, while racing a bit, was steady. It was time, I was sure, to take the next step. This one was to be a different from the ones behind me. This one was to be off the edge of the cliff.
So step I did. One last exhale and my finger pushed send launching the “I Have Something to Tell You” newsletter to your inboxes. No returning to the ledge. Trusting that this step was certain. For the last 3 years, the My Toy Garden journey has felt one far beyond my doing on my own but one guided by a higher power. As sure as I was to begin the journey, I am sure that the leap off of the cliff was the right step too. A time to trust in a greater plan than I could ever make on my own.
So now here I am….falling…falling…falling…. For days now….falling…. falling… To my surprise though, I am calm. I am peaceful. I am happy. I am not sure how this fall will end but I am sure that all will be as it is meant to be. The picture of my nephew below has resonated in my thoughts. I have felt since last October when I first listed the business for sale privately, that it will sell. That it will continue with a new owner who has the time and talent to maintain and take it to a new level. To make the next dreams I have for it reality. But who? I can see the seeds that were strewn about years ago blossoming and growing into a beautiful garden. In the center is something missing. It’s time to find the centerpiece that will begin the next season of the store. I need your help to find it.
My business broker has met with a woman who would be a wonderful new toy lady. She is someone who wants to keep the store as it is and sprinkle more seeds to grow it. She is someone with the time, talent and enthusiasm to take over. She is working on the financial pieces of it and that’s where you come in. I feel that it’s not one person I’m looking for but two perhaps: one to run the store and one to invest in the store. I believe I have found one. Now I need to find the other. Who do you know that is ready to make a difference to families in the Carmel community and partner to keep it open? I feel it is one of you or someone you know that we are looking for. Please share the press release below anywhere you can to help us find an investor or a new owner. Time is running short as the shelves empty. I suspect in another 2-3 weeks the shelves will be bare of almost. All things truly are possible though. I believe. If you or anyone you know has questions, please let me know.
I think I see the bottom coming clearer and my parachute beginning to open. I’m looking. I’m listening. I’m trusting. And praying. What cliff are you standing at the edge of? Be brave. Listen for guidance and if you hear that your next step is to step off, then step off and know that you will be caught somehow, someway. The way is not for you to know. Trust. Thank you for being part of this journey. It’s going to be an interesting next few weeks!

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